Feels Like It's Time to Dream Again

Friday. NYP interns gone. Will be in the office as only intern. On-campus training tomorrow in school.

What can I say...

I was just thinking today... and it dawned upon me... Never was a time when I succeed, it's because I asked for it. Many times is unexpecetd success or when I still faithless and God showed His power and grace.

"Ask and you will recieve..." I used to think how my parents would come to know God, and how some of my friends would come to know God... and even how I thought I would excel in my studies... Then everything came crashing down and out of my plan.

"If my plan change because of Your plan (that never changes), than may I obey..." So I went through some changes and life transitions... Even to the point where I thought I don't know how to proceed anymore (I meant that out of my personal opinion). I layed down many things... Then I found that I have more to lay down... lolx. Seems funny to me.

"We will be made perfect in Him." God gave me a pair of hands that I thought I could not do some stuff... How can such small hands draw portraits and play guitar?! I thought God will let me play by this beginning of year. Until I saw that others have gone yet I have not, I started to doubt God why He gave me so much and not allow me to use them in such extent yet? I'm sorry...

Patience is my weakness... Funny how I always wait. I am a "waiter". Haha!!


I don't like to wait, but I always wait. Either I was forced to wait, or I choose to wait. Either way, I wait. If I wait and not focus on why I wait and the result of my waiting, I have waited in vain. But if I wait for what I will not get for what I expected, is that worthy? If my wait will result from what comes from God, it'll be the best and most perfect. This is because all good things come from God and no bad things come from God, as God is God and He is good. If while I wait and I stumbled because I could not comprehend the end result and doubt my expected reward, I could choose to stop waiting and waste away all my waited time, or stand firm and believe faith-fully. I really don't want to miss out... Am I a fool to say that I rather wait? Am I waiting for what is illusive? I am waiting for my transformation to His like-ness daily (which is happening everyday). I am waiting for the gospel to spread and the whole wide world to hear His offer of life for His exchange of sacrifice on the cross. I am waiting for the chance to be able to play on stage for Jesus (this is my struggle). I am waiting for something which I do not even know... I am awaiting...

"Wait upon Him. Wait for him."